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Negative Self Talk

Negative self-talk refers to the internal dialogue in which a person criticizes, doubts, or demeans themselves.

The river runs deep...

Negative self talk often takes the form of automatic, unhelpful thoughts that reinforce low self-esteem, feelings of inadequacy, or self-doubt.

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Common Types of Negative Self-Talk:

  1. Personalizing: Blaming yourself for things that are beyond your control.

    • Example: "Everything always goes wrong because I can't handle it."

  2. Filtering: Focusing solely on the negatives and ignoring the positives.

    • Example: "I made one mistake, so the whole project is a failure."

  3. Catastrophizing: Expecting the worst-case scenario to happen, even when it's unlikely.

    • Example: "If I don't succeed at this, everything will fall apart."

  4. All-or-Nothing Thinking: Viewing situations in extremes, such as perfect or a total disaster.

    • Example: "I always make bad choices," or "I never do anything right."

  5. Labeling: Assigning negative labels to yourself, which reinforces harmful beliefs.

    • Example: "I'm so stupid," or "I'm a failure."

Negative self-talk refers to the internal dialogue in which a person criticizes, doubts, or demeans themselves. This often takes the form of automatic, unhelpful thoughts that reinforce low self-esteem, feelings of inadequacy, or self-doubt. It can be a major barrier to personal growth and well-being because it perpetuates limiting beliefs about one's capabilities and worth.

Examples of Negative Self-Talk:

  • "I'm never good enough."

  • "I always make bad choices."

  • "I'll never be successful."

  • "Why even try? I’ll just mess up again."

Effects of Negative Self-Talk:

  • Lower self-esteem: Constantly berating yourself damages your self-worth and confidence.

  • Increased anxiety or depression: Persistent negative thoughts contribute to mental health challenges.

  • Reduced motivation: Believing you can't succeed makes it hard to put effort into trying.

  • Self-sabotage: Negative thoughts can cause you to undermine your own goals, consciously or subconsciously.

How to Combat Negative Self-Talk:

  1. Recognize the Patterns: Be aware of when you're engaging in negative self-talk.

  2. Challenge the Thoughts: Ask yourself if your thoughts are based on facts or feelings.

  3. Replace with Positive Affirmations: Swap negative statements with constructive, empowering thoughts.

    • Instead of: "I always make bad choices," try: "I can learn from my past choices and make better ones."

  4. Practice Self-Compassion: Treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you'd offer a friend.